My World, Shrinking

I was never the soft one. I had the harsh edges and the strong opinions. A bit on the Asperger’s scale, what’s in front of my face is the most important thing in the world at the moment, and sometimes it’s hard for people like me to think about consequences. It’s haunted me my entire…

The Rogue Tear

I’ve seen the phenomena before without realizing what it was. It never occurred to me that I could dig past the obvious and find a hidden well of emotion–or, perhaps it did and I just avoided doing it. A lone tear sliding down someone’s cheek can be written off as so many things, particularly when…

Technology Fail: Racist Bullets

Behavioral therapist Charles Kinsey was shot by police while lying on his back on the pavement, hands in the air, saying, “Please officer, don’t shoot. I’m not armed. I’m complying.” Kinsey is black. Kinsey was working with an autistic white man who had run from his group home with a toy truck in his hand.…

Killing It

  Gretel walked to the edge of the course and squinted down range, holding her hand above her knockoff, Ferragamo sunglasses to see past the noonday glare. “I can’t even see the target,” she said without turning as a gentle breeze lifted the golden curls from her shoulder. She closed her eyes and delighted in…

Rare

rare: rer/ adjective (of an event, situation, or condition) not occurring very often. As far as the English language goes, it’s a simple word. Four letters, one syllable–an innocuous word when not applied to a noun. But, throw a noun into the mix and you have something either really good or really bad. Example: Rare…

50

There have been many times in my life I felt I wouldn’t live to see 50. I lived a dangerous and often stupid existence, particularly in my younger, adrenaline fueled years. The thought of jumping out of a helicopter, off the edge of a building or (be still my older, wiser heart) free climbing hundreds…

Taken For Granted

How do we focus on taking care of ourselves when there are so many temptations in the world ready to help us do the opposite? Uhg. Life is precious. Each moment is a bright and shining gift that should be treasured, yada, yada, yada. We’ve all heard it before and it obviously hasn’t moved us.…

You

    You are by far the most important thing in my life…you have been from the beginning. Even before I knew you, I was searching for you, making you the center of my existence long before I ever saw your face. You are my greatest journey. You accepted me from the beginning as I was,…

Stop Crying

What do you do when the only person you’ve ever been able to fully express your emotions with, can’t be there anymore. Stop Crying. When you spend your whole life adjusting your personality to filter your emotions, it must be a special person who succeeds in unprogramming that trait. A harsh father, years of military…

Later

Like a slow knife penetrating the gut, the doctor’s test result briefing was bad–though we didn’t understand most of his terms, we could tell by the expression on his face that there wasn’t much in the way of good news. But then came a word we recognized; tumor. The thing about cancer is that it’s…

Remission is the Mission

Home for 40 hours, but it still doesn’t feel like home…I don’t know if it ever will again. It’s always hard, I’m sure. But you never realize exactly how hard until it sneaks up behind you and shoves you down the stairs…then jumps on your chest and starts punching you in the face—-fuck cancer. For…